Daily Dyson

Now Mini-Me has a sex tape that is about to be released.

Great.

Looks like the man has some time on his hands.

He definitely needed some relaxin time after saving the planet.

Need help defining sarcasm? You have definitely gone to the right place.

Mowing Under the Influence.

In a follow up to yesterday’s story of a drunken wheelchair joyride, an Alaska man has been charged with DUI for leading police on a slow speed chase on his lawnmower.

Make sure you haven’t had too much to drink when driving a car wheelchair.

A New York man has been accused of cutting a hole in a woman’s couch, and hiding inside until she arrived home.

Happy Monday!

For the Phish fans…

File this one in the collectible section.

George Bush hates black people. Er, Kanye hates music fans.

Kanye West, the self proclaimed Jesus, really did a number on the fans down at Bonnaroo this past weekend. Check the story here.

We aren’t exactly experts in the art of celebrity, but isn’t better to appreciate your fans than hold them in so much contempt that you think they will just swallow whatever attitude you throw at them?

Kids, don’t try this at home, the driving range.